Movie Review: Bullet Train

There are so many things facinating to consider when a stupid and bad movie like “Bullet Train” is released. How can a high level named star like Brad Pitt read, comprehend and then decide to make garbage like this after reading the script? Did someone just gather together some named stars like Brad Pitt and throw in cameos from Ryan Reynolds, Channing Tatum and Sandra Bullock and believe that all those well known bankable personalities can rescue an extremely bad movie? Did someone owe some producer or director a favor, given that Channing Tatum and Sandra Bullock were the main stars in the recent also bad “The Lost City” where Brad Pitt did a cameo in their movie? How much money was spent on a story, script, idea this stupid? How much money will be lost when decisions to make a movie this horrible are accumulated over a long period of time?

The best critical comments on Rotten Tomatoes about this movie is from Rex Reed who wrote “Just when you think you’ve seen the worst movie ever made, along comes a pile of toxic waste called Bullet Train. During the course of an interminable and unimpeachably excruciating two hours and six minutes, this abomination of a movie not only kills off almost everyone onboard but demolishes two of the world’s most miraculous trains as well. I could not agree more with these comments.

For me there were only 2 good things about this mess. The heavy English accents make much of the stupid dialogue indiscernible. The Bullet Train in Japan is a very impressive means of very fast transportation that cost 90 billion dollars to build. Other than that, there is nothing good here. The scenes are disconnected and all over the place. There is no logical flow, anywhere. There is flipping from different timelines trying to explain this garbage of movie mess. Nothing makes any sense, increasing the hopes that this torture of 2 hours of wasted film will finally be over.

The Rotten Tomatoes ratings for this movie are a way too high 53%, with my rating of 3% – only for those who are interested in seeing Japan’s impressive bullet train. Do yourself a favor and miss this embarrassment of movie making – one of the worst movies ever made.